


Oh, oh my, what is that hideous thing?

by saracollinskay (Emilia_Elaine)



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, And by small amount of angst I mean tiny, Breasts are mentioned, F/M, Fluff, How is Dickon and Jeyne not a pairing yet?, I Don't Even Know, Jon and Sansa Are Not Related, Jon and the Starks Are Not Related, Jon has a hard time holding his beer, Jon is not good about hiding his feelings, Jonsa Secret Santa 2018, JonsaSecretSanta2018, Robb is an awesome best friend, Secret Santa, Tags Are Hard, Ugly Christmas Sweaters, college party, small amount of Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-26 22:24:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17150186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emilia_Elaine/pseuds/saracollinskay
Summary: “Good Gods! What is that?” Robb shouted as he came to an abrupt stop, nearly causing Jon to drop his beer as he stumble into him.“I should have stayed in,” Jon grumbled as he straightened himself and glared at the back of his friend’s head.It was the last day of term and Jon was supposed to be having a quite night in. The plan was to veg out on the couch watching the Christmas classics. That was until Robb had barged in his room and begged him to attend the annual Greek Bon Voyage Christmas Party.So here he was, beer in hand, squeezing through the throngs of people, counting down the minutes until he could return to the solitude of his flat. The counting stopped the moment Robb weaved to the side and he caught a glimpse of what had to be the world’s ugliest Christmas sweater.Oh, oh my, what is that hideous thing?





	Oh, oh my, what is that hideous thing?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TheWindsOfWolves](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWindsOfWolves/gifts).



> This little ditty is part of the JonsaSecretSanta2018 for the magnificent thewindsofwolves!  
> I know it's late and I am so sorry.  
> I just couldn't get the flow right on the original fic. So I scraped it, and here we are.  
> I hope you enjoy it!

“Good Gods! What is that?” Robb shouted as he came to an abrupt stop, nearly causing Jon to drop his beer as he stumble into him. 

“I should have stayed in,” Jon grumbled as he straightened himself and glared at the back of his friend’s head. 

Robb made an unintelligible comment over his shoulder as he determinately began to move forward once more. With a suppressed sigh and no other choice, Jon begrudgingly followed after his friend. 

\------  
It was the last day of term and Jon was supposed to be having a quite night in, packing and vegging out to the Christmas classics. That was until Robb had barged in his room and begged him to attend the annual Greek Bon Voyage Christmas Party.  
“Come on Jon! This is our last Christmas break that we are ever going to have. Don’t you want to give our college experience a proper sendoff? It will be fun!”  
\------

The party was in full swing when they arrived; and just as predicted there was loud music, cheap beer, and a barrage of drinking games. The worst part was how crammed the place was.

So here he was, beer in hand, squeezing through the throngs of people, and counting down the minutes until he could return to the solitude of his flat. The counting stopped the moment Robb weaved to the side and he came face to face with what had to be the world’s ugliest Christmas sweater. 

The sweater, if it could even be called that, was bulky and fuzzy. No, not fuzzy. Hairy would be a more accurate description. The sweater reminded him of Bumble the Abominable Snow Monster. That is, if the monster had emerged from a swamp rather than the depths of a snowy cave. The fur was matted and moss green, giving the item a shaggy algae-like appearance. The shadows cast by the tangled masses were reminiscent of rusty tap water. Moving his eye’s downward, Jon concluded that the pants of this sweater’s owner were no better. The jeans seemed to shift color with the light from a spruce blue to a tarnished bronze, thus clashing with the bulky top above.

So transfixed by the monstrosity before him, Jon nearly dropped his cup again when his gaze finally moved from the pants, up the sweater, and to its owner. Recognition struck, leaving Jon a flabbergasted mess as he took in the red hair and blue eyes of Sansa Stark. 

She was in an animated conversation with Robb over something. Jon couldn’t say as to what. He was too busy trying to internalize why Sansa would willingly wear something so revolting. She was beautiful, witty, and had a sense of style that half of her coeds envied. Watching her face become flush as she argued with Robb, he supposed she would look lovely in a trash bag. Not that he would ever tell her that, especially with his best friend, her older brother, two feet away.

Jon was torn from his musings with a soft “Hello Jon,” from Sansa. Both siblings attention were now directed at him. Robb had an eyebrow raised in annoyance and Sansa in anticipation. Sansa’s cheeks were still rosy and Jon really wished he had been paying attention to the conversation before. 

“San, what are wearing?” he blurted. Simultaneously, Sansa’s face fell and Robb let out a loud “thank you!” to the ceiling. “I mean…..uh……it’s for the sweater contest right?” Jon intentionally left out ugly in his vain attempt to backpedal. 

“It is,” Sansa said with a small smile. “I made it myself. Do you like it?”

”I-I like the fur bit,” Jon stuttered as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Don’t encourage her,” Robb warned. His glare was not lost on Jon. 

Jon wanted to say more to Sansa, to make up for his earlier blunder, especially now that Sansa’s smile had grown, showing off her dimples, but as he opened his mouth Theon Greyjoy yelled into his microphone that they were about to announce the winner of the Ugly Sweater Contest. 

Sansa’s smile turned eager as she made to move past Robb and Jon with the intent to join Theon and the other ugly sweater contestants. As she passed, Jon subconsciously placed his hand on her lower back to help steer her through the crowd of bodies that had formed around them. Jon’s eyes widened in shock as he looked down to where his hand laid upon Sansa. He had expected the texture of rough fur, crusty cotton balls, maybe even soft lamb’s wool, but he definitely had not expected the soft, smooth feel of Sansa’s alabaster skin. Her sweater, which now most certainly could not be constituted as such, had no back, unless the three inch piece of fabric holding it together at the bottom counted as one. Jon’s mouth went dry as it dawned on him that there was no visible bra either. 

Retracting his hand as if it had been burned, Jon watched as Sansa continued over to her friend Jeyne Poole, only stopping for a brief moment to smirk at him over her shoulder.

Jon’s heart was racing. Looking around, he realized he wasn’t the only guy in the room to notice Sansa’s state of undress. He didn’t know what to do. Sansa was surrounded by dozens of drunk frat guys in half of a fuzzy sweater. No. Not fuzzy. A hairy sweater, with no bra. Even Theon had made sure to saddle up next to her with one hand placed on her waist, and not above the fabric, Jon might add. 

“How could you let her wear that Robb?” Jon growled at his best friend. 

“Me?” Robb looked affronted. “Were you not listening to our conversation just a minute ago? I begged her to cover-up with something. I even assured her that you agreed with me, but instead you had to go and tell her that you were in love with it!” 

Jon rubbed a hand over his face. “I never said I was in love with it. I just didn’t want to insult the work she put into it.”

“Give me a break Jon,” Robb huffed, “You aren’t upset about what she is wearing. Not truly. You’re just upset that you aren’t the only one who gets to see her in it.” 

Jon felt his face pale and his hands become clammy. “W-what? What are you talking about Robb?”

Robb sighed. “I get it. I do. We’re best friends. We have been since primary school, and as best friends I can always tell when someone has caught your eye. You acted the same way before we left for university. I always assumed it was Jeyne since she was constantly around the house growing up, but you never batted an eye when Theon would shamelessly flirt with her, “Robb indicated towards their friend, who thankfully had removed his hand from Sansa, “or when she and Dickon snuck off from the group a couple weeks back. That’s when I knew I was wrong.” 

Jon took a deep breath and let it rush out. “I’m sorry Robb. I never meant to….” he trailed off as he looked down at his shoes. 

“I know you didn’t. We don’t choose who we love.” Robb stated as he gripped Jon’s shoulder. Jon’s head shot up with wide eyes. Robb gave him a half grin and his shoulder a reassuring squeeze before his face became serious. “Just know that I will kill you if you do anything to hurt or dishonor my sister.” 

Jon audibly swallowed and gave Robb a curt nod. Robb’s smile reappeared and he slapped Jon on the back. “Good! Now that we have that settled, will you please go and convince my sister to put something over that ghastly thing?” 

Jon stumbled over himself in his attempt to get away from Robb and over to Sansa. She was celebrating her victory with Jeyne and Dickon, jumping up and down. This caused the sides of her sweater to billow giving just a peek of the sides of her breasts. Jon was relieved when she noticed his approach and threw her arms around his neck. Jon, who did drop his beer this time, wrapped his arms around her quickly, crushing the material of her sweater to her sides once more. 

After a prolonged hug, Jon could feel Sansa grin into the side of his neck. “Are you going to hug me all night Jon Snow?” 

“Uh, no,” Jon stated, but it came out as more of a question. “I’m just trying to protect your honor.”

Sansa giggled as she pulled back slightly from their embrace. “My honor?”

“Err, yeah,” Jon could feel his cheeks heating up. “Your sweater is missing a bit of material in the back and I’m shielding you from lecherous stares.”

Sansa burst into laughter, but soon sobered up, at the sincere look on Jon’s face. “You realize the sweater is meant to be missing that bit of fabric right?” Sansa asked as she began to play with the curls at the nape of his neck. At Jon’s brisk nod, she leaned in and whispered in his ear, “There’s only one lustful stare I’m really interested in.” She could feel the tightening of his arms and a shaky breath on her neck. She leaned back to take in Jon’s hooded gaze. His solemn eyes were dilated, leaving very little grey visible. Sansa smiled as she leaned in to rub her nose against his before resting their foreheads together. 

Leaving his left arm looped around Sansa’s waist, Jon moved his right hand to cup her cheek. As his thumb ran across her jawline he tilted is head to the side allowing their lips to lightly brush one another. 

The moment was broken when Theon catcalled, causing the two to spring apart. Jon rubbed the back of his neck. He could feel the flush on his face, and glancing over at Sansa, he could tell that she was fairing no better. Clearing his throat, Jon took her hand. Sansa’s eyes went wide and her blush spread. Jon wondered just how far it went, when he remembered that she was still only in half a shirt. 

Jon began quickly removing his blue and black plaid button-up, managing to pop off the last two buttons in his haste. He thanked the old gods and new that he had worn his signature black tee underneath. Sansa timidly took the offered shirt and slipped into the bathroom to change. 

Jon nervously cleared his throat upon Sansa’s return. Partly to distract himself from how gorgeous Sansa looked wearing his shirt, but also to buck-up the courage to talk to her again. All of the confidence from before Theon came and ruined everything was gone.

They stood quietly for a moment, as Sansa picked at the fur on her sweater that was currently draped over her arm and Jon stared at his shoes. Taking a deep breath, Jon looked up and caught her eye. “Do you want to get out of here? I think Sunspear is still open this time of night. We could go and talk. I know how much you love their lemon cake and blood orange sangria.” That earned Jon a beaming smile and an enthusiastic nod.

“Okay then,” Jon smiled, taking Sansa’s hand. As they made their way towards the exit, they spotted Robb, who held up his red solo cup to them in a toast. With a parting smile, they escaped into the street hand in hand, with one ugly sweater, and their whole future ahead of them.


End file.
